Guys don’t need to wear anything special.

Today’s the scheduled Day Without Women, and here I am at work and hardly even wearing red.

Someone asked: when’s the Day Without Men?

You know what? I actually think this is a great idea. We should absolutely have a Day Without Men. A whole 24-hour period in which men don’t show up.

Here’s how it’ll go: Men, don’t go to work. Just say at home. No need to wear any special colors. Since you’re spending the day at home, you can go naked for all I care. Don’t go outside; no shopping. You can order stuff online if you like. Don’t make charity donations. Don’t look at social media. No phone calls except for 911 emergencies. You can text your guy friends, but don’t make contact with any women except for the ones that live in your house, and even then, the interaction should mostly be asking what household chores you can do while they’re at work. Definitely do NOT go on Twitter and engage with feminists talking about the wage gap or street harassment. Stay off YouTube and OKCupid.

Okay, I can make exceptions. If you’re an EMT, a firefighter, an ER physician or nurse, or one of the guys who repair power lines, then please go to work as scheduled. Everyone else: stay home behind closed doors.

Hell, we can even schedule it on a weekend to minimize the number of men who have to take a day off work. From 6 am to the next 5:59 am, all men stay in their homes. Then women will find out what it’s like to go a day without men.

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