Feeling a little better now.

While all my GoT peeps were going nuts on Twitter today, I was caught in a constant parade of brain-scrambling fuckery at work, and that’s nowhere near as much fun as it sounds. Basically, everyone spent all day forcing me to fall behind on my workload, and that’s the opposite of a restful day. So I didn’t have the time or the headspace to do a post on the HBO-sanctioned synopses for episodes 6 and 7.

Well. I’m feeling a bit better now, so, here’s what I want to deal with: who’s still in King’s Landing these days?

Episode 6: “Blood of My Blood”

Summary: An old foe comes back into the picture. Gilly meets Sam’s family. Arya faces a difficult choice. Jaime faces off against the High Sparrow.

We’re all pretty sure the “old foe” is Walder Frey. I was just now messing around in Google Drive, trying to figure out who else it could be, and…nothing. One of the fabulous things about Game of Thrones is that there aren’t many characters who can be defined as “foes,” so that narrows this matter way down. Everyone on the show who could be legitimately described unambiguously as a villain either hasn’t been out of sight, or is now dead, or can’t very well come back because they haven’t been properly recognized as a foe. I can’t think of any options except Walder Frey.

Episode 7: “The Broken Man”

Yeah, I’m still pumped for that title.

Summary: The High Sparrow eyes another target. Jaime confronts a hero. Arya makes a plan. The North is reminded.

The “hero” we’re all fairly sure is Uncle Brynden the Blackfish, marking the return of House Tully. That’ll be cool. I wish I could think of what Arya’s plan may be, but no. The part described as “the North is reminded” is likely to be freaking amazing, but that doesn’t warrant running predictions. What I’m interested in, is the High Sparrow’s new target.

This is one of those places where it’s getting tricky this season: who’s left in King’s Landing?

By “new target,” I think we can infer they mean someone who hasn’t already been arrested.

And really, who’s left in the capital for them to arrest anymore? We’ve got the Lannisters, the Tyrells, and a few hangers-on.

The Lannisters are getting too thin on the ground. The Faith might like to arrest Jaime, but this is the part where he gets out of town. They already have Lancel in their ranks. I’m pretty sure they don’t have any dirt on Kevan. They’ve already arrested Cersei, and Tommen is too conciliatory to be a target.

The Tyrells…they might like to arrest Olenna, but I’m fairly sure they won’t pick on the Tyrells any more than what they’re doing now. The Faith Militant are, when you sweep aside all that pretty rhetoric about piety and humility, a bunch of bullies. They’re depending on their targets not to fight back effectively. What the Tyrells are doing in Ep6 is showing they can fight back effectively.

What other named characters are still in King’s Landing, aside from the Lannisters and Tyrells? I think Obara and Nymeria Sand are still running around, and I have some interesting ideas for what they might be doing, but those do not mesh well with the Sparrows arresting them. Since Meryn Trant hit Arya’s knife with his face, there aren’t any more Kingsguard knights with names and faces except Jaime and…Ser Gregor. Let’s face it: are the Sparrows going to touch FrankenGregor with a ten-foot spear? Aside from the unlucky fucker who ends up fighting him in Cersei’s trial by combat, I doubt it very much. Littlefinger would have made a juicy target for the Sparrows, but he’s far out of the way these days.

That leaves Grand Maester Pycelle and Qyburn.

As much as Pycelle’s a gross old fuckhead, the Sparrows probably don’t have anything on him and come to think of it, I’m not sure he’s really done anything against their rules. He likes to hire sex workers, but they’re adult female sex workers, and since Pycelle is unmarried, male and heterosexual, they don’t have much to gain from scrutinizing his sex life. Finally, there’s no one in King’s Landing who wants to humiliate Pycelle more than they want to go all Rains of Castamere on the Sparrows.

Qyburn, though? I’m sure they’d love to get their hands on him. And I’m sure Pycelle would just love to see him under arrest.

Therefore, my gonzo prediction on this front is that Pycelle goes to the High Sparrow and provides evidence against Qyburn. They might try to arrest him, but first, Pycelle winds up dead, so there goes the case.