I Enjoy This Too Much: “Valyrian steel.”

I wish I could say this is enough, and I’ve finally gotten this absurdity out of my system, but the truth is that this is Jaime and Brienne’s last interaction of the series thus far. This will be my last post in this vein only until Game of Thrones gives me a chance to take more screenshots.

In case you all were wondering whether I was crass enough to indulge in juvenile innuendo: We’re going Innuendo and out the other. To tell the truth, I’m kind of surprised it’s taken me this long to go there.

Up close on Brienne. Her line on the show is:

Up close on Brienne. Her line on the show is: “Valyrian steel.” I have added: “Let’s talk about this shiny sword you’re showing off.”

It’s super-hard and always sharp.

Up close on Jaime. His line on the show is:

Up close on Jaime. His line on the show is: “It’s yours.” I have added: “I want YOU to wield this very special sword.”

I love how serious he looks. How often do we see Jaime looking THAT serious?

Back to Brienne, looking alarmed. Her line on the show is:

Back to Brienne, looking alarmed. Her line on the show is: “I can’t accept this.” I have added: “But I’m not worthy to wield YOUR SWORD.”


Back to Jaime, still perfectly calm. His line on the show is:

Back to Jaime, still perfectly calm. His line on the show is: “You swore an oath to return the Stark girls to their mother.” I have added: “Yes, you are. I don’t trust anyone else with this thing, but you’ll handle it well.”

“You’re strong, but also gentle. You’ll do good things with my sword.

“Also, here’s some new armor, which I ordered for you without first asking your measurements. I estimated, based on having seen you naked. You like?”

Brienne is calm again. On the show her line is:

Brienne is calm again. On the show her line is: “I’ll find her. For Lady Catelyn. And for you.” I have added: “Yes, Jaime. I will carry your very special sword wherever I go, and I will polish it at every opportunity.”

I’d like to say the worst of the innuendo has passed, but…no, it hasn’t.

We're outside. Jaime and Podrick are in the foreground, with their backs to us. Brienne faces the camera, wearing her new armor. Her line on the show is:

We’re outside. Jaime and Podrick are in the foreground, with their backs to us. Brienne faces the camera, wearing her new armor. Her line on the show is: “He’ll slow me down.” I have added: “I only want my lion slowing me down! Not some inept squire.”

(And she doesn’t want this earnest kid watching while she polishes the sword.)

We're facing Jaime and Podrick.  Jaime's line on the show is:

We’re facing Jaime and Podrick. Jaime’s line on the show is: “You’re keeping him from harm. It’s chivalry.” I have added: “I have a lot of guilt where Tyrion is concerned. If you look after his squire, that’ll make him feel better, which will make me feel better. Oh, and I totally know how to manipulate you.”

“A captive knight has the right to know his captor’s identity, and…YES. Now I know your name.” Remember that? He knows how to press her buttons. He knows where the buttons are.

Brienne looks off to the side. No line on the show. I have added:

Brienne looks off to the side. No line on the show. I have added: “Damn it, you really do.”

In the book, it’s Jaime who comes up with the name for his sword, and he very nicely asks Brienne to honor his choice of name. On the show, he invites her to come up with a name for his Very Special Sword.

Close-up on Brienne. Her line on the show is:

Close-up on Brienne. Her line on the show is: “Oathkeeper.” I have added: “I’ll carry your sword, I’ll wield it well, and I’ll look after your twisted little brother’s idiot squire. Don’t forget about me.”

It’s the same name.

I think we’ll have to wait until Season 6 before they get a chance to interact again. By the time that happens, perhaps I’ll have grown up a bit. Then again, perhaps the screencap fodder they give us will be so juicy I won’t even have anything to add.