As long as I’m on the subject of Twitter trends:

If William and Kate value their sanity, they’ll screw this #royalwedding business and go sneak off to some remote Canadian small town and elope. Put on wigs and fake noses en route, switch planes in Nova Scotia, and let the mayor of Moose Nostril, Nunavut hitch them up. Then they come back to Britain, hop off the royal jet and say to the press, “LOL married now!”

Never gonna happen, I know. It’s fun to imagine how it would make the press explode in an orgy of faux outrage and disapproval, though.